I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
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