i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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