We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
