It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
