Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize
