The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
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