i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
