I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
