yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
