Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
