I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
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