great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Boobs speak an international language.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
