is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Come see our sink grown plant.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
