wat bout pragnant strippers??
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
