Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Small penises have feelings too.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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