My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
do herpes really smell.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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