took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Randomize
