mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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