If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Girls should come with a carfax report
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Randomize
