Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
