what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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