It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
So much rum. So many feels.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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