Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
