So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Last time i carry you out of a forest
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
