i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
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