Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Randomize
