Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
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