We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
You're like the curious george of whores
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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