Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
She bit a glass in half.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
