dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
