please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
He did a backflip because drugs
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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