margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Randomize
