I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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