is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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