Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I just want nice things and good sex
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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