the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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