Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
