I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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