when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
