I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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