You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize
