i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
