butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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