Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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