Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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