what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
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