The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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