Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Randomize
