So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
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