Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
